I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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