Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize
