i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
