so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize
