Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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