I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
