I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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