i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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