If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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