found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
You did what with his pubic hair?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
