Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
