Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
