So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
