Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i think my mom watched the whole time
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
