a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
