I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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