Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
