Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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