i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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