By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
