bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
