ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
