I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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