Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
