Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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