if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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