You work out of a Hotel?
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
