discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
