We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.�
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
