I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
The adults are the big ones right?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
