woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
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