i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
one might say we're banned from that church
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
