there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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