just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
