pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
tell me about the fingering
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize