Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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