didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Also, beer. Big fan.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
