well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
