found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
