dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I think pants incapable of making pants work
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