What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
