Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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