I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
