When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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