he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
