Do vagina's smell?
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
