hell yes lets make some ravioli
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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