smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
