discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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