i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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