You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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